The local Tim Horton’s Cafe is a
hotbed of gossip in my community. There are a lot of us old codgers who gather
there morning and afternoon to coffee and talk. The men talk about weather,
machinery, and…much too often, about the negative aspects of anyone different
from themselves. Lots of misogyny, lots of implied and expressed racism.
Muslims, Aboriginal people (usually portrayed as lazy and/or drunk), women and
young people are regular topics, Not every day, and not every one, but often enough that it’s depressing.
Also, whenever there is something
new and unidentified happening in town, there are myriad rumours about what is really happening, and who is doing it. For example, a large
parcel of land near Tim’s has been a vacant meadow for years. Suddenly, a few
weeks ago, earth moving equipment moved in and began stripping away the topsoil
and the clay beneath it. Al the earth was hauled away, and the vast hole got
about five feet deep, covering an area as large as seven or eight football
fields. They dug down deep enough that the water of the old swamp began to show
at the surface. Then, overnight, the activity changed. Sand began to be trucked
in, hundreds of tons of it. It was spread thinly around, and then methodically
packed down, layer by layer, until the surface was at the original level of
earth. It was clear that something was to be built there. But what? And by
whom?
The men began sniffing around
their contracting buddies to find out. The women surreptitiously canvassed
their connection in the female world. Answer after answer came to the surface
and then ran out of steam. Answer after answer poured out of the Biddy Crew Finally, one
morning, a lady at the next table proudly announced that one of our local
pharmacists had purchased the land and was building seniors housing on it.
Duplexes, with double garages.. In the stunned silence that followed, on of the
other old ladies, usually a heavy hitter in the gossip game, pursed her lips
and announced, “I know,” in an attempt to trump her friend. The conversation
rolled onto other topics. One winner, and a room full of losers.
On Thursday morning – yesterday –
a school bus rolled into the parking lot at about two minutes to ten, and
spilled out a load of sleepy teens. The Biddy Crew instantly began to chatter
in an annoyed cacophony. “What’s a School Bus doing in the parking lot? There’s
no room for it here! Someone should go out and tell him to move…and what are
these kids doing here? The day has hardly begun at school and these kids are
coming in here for coffee! Don’t they ever do anything in school? It’s not even
Friday!”
Out of the milling crowd a woman
in jeans and a cap emerged. She was much younger than the Biddy Crew, and
somewhat older than the kids. Turned out, she was their teacher. She explained
quietly, to the whole table that the kids were on a field trip to a goat and
cheese farm, to learn where their food came from. It was part of their
nutrition course. The teacher explained that some of the class had “chosen” to
stay home rather than come, and as a reward to the attendees, she was buying
them all coffee!
The silence was stunned and
prolonged. In an instant, the wise teacher had take her kids and the bus driver
out of the firing line, and shut down the Biddy Crew completely! I was laughing
so hard into my sleeve that I had to leave the table. A whole morning’s gossip
and complaining about ‘youth today’ was blown away in a second!
Going to Tim’s in the morning is
such fun! I usually take a book, sit by myself and read…and listen. Now and
then…like yesterday… I join a table and listen, throwing in the odd comment to
egg on the speculation. Who needs TV? Who needs a job? This is entertainment at
its best in small town Alberta!
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